So Confused...

FAIR WARNING TALKY POST!


Okay, so in my last post I spoke about doubting that I was going to get a happy birthday from a certain friend but at 11:09 pm she sent me a message basically saying happy birthday now that I'm 21 I can go to Vegas and actually get into clubs and drink and do vegas the right way and of course go see Thunder From Down Under which I sorta laughed at because when we went together we got a lot of attention from a few members of the show in passing ;) plus we were only 17 at the time so we felt like some real hot shit you know? Well, I responded to her saying not right now and money is tight which it is also the fact that I didn't want to go see them without her because we always said it would be "our" thing. Then she goes; "why not? why is money tight? why can't you?" lastly I said "it's not like I won't ever get to see them just not now that's all" An the convo stopped there...
     What hurts is the fact that she either doesn't seem too  understand that it's something I've always wanted to do with her. Also it may date back to my graduation present which happened to be going to Vegas and seeing Aerosmith live which was suppose to happen but she couldn't pay for her plane ticket :( I do think while she was supportive and was a really good spot about the whole thing and let me blab all about it too her. I couldn't say the same if the roles we're switched cause I'd be soooooo jealous!
I don't know honestly all I wish is we can get back to our silly selves and how we use to be I feel so out of the loop with her life she use to tell me everything and I did the same but now it's just so awkward... This whole situation is something that's caused a lot of issues with me emotionally because I desperately want that best friend-friendship we had. It sucks drifting apart from somebody who meant so much to you. Maybe one day we will be like we use too but a lot of stuff would need to change and I don't have much hope for that happening because it's been 2 almost 3 years since I felt so far away from her like we just disconnected.

Love, Tay